Thump me on the head if I spend one more minute watching a long, drawn-out online video touting something that is too good to be true.
You know the ones, where you think they are about to give you the recipe for the gelatin diet, and you have everything you need right there in your kitchen cupboard. They show glass dishes full of Jell-O that look just like what you see in every cafeteria in America. Then you’re instructed to keep watching, and they’ll give you the recipe.
Why would you want this recipe? Because it’s magic! It makes you lose weight without dieting or exercising. The fat simply melts away. So fast, they say, that some people have to stop taking it because none of their clothes fit after two weeks.
You’ll see famous people such as Oprah Winfrey telling how great the recipe is. She says she has fought her weight for most of her life and now, voila! She will never have to worry about it again. (According to news reports, Winfrey has not actually endorsed these diets, and her appearance was generated by “deep-fake” AI technology).
Mid video, some doctor, or at least someone in a white doctor coat sometimes accessorized with a stethoscope, explains with graphs and charts and drawings of cells just how the combination of ingredients works. Some explain the advantages of baking soda, ginger, berberine, pure gelatin, etc. Sounds easy, right?
Then you see thin women holding up giant-size jeans saying that’s what they used to wear. And testimonials from sincere, joyous, even ecstatic users of the recipe. And to think: no shots, no big doctor bills, and it’s all natural. Hmm.
Just think, you can lose weight and still eat pizza, you don’t have to go the gym or exercise, your attitude changes for the better, and even with this tremendous amount of weight loss your skin won’t sag, thanks to NAD+. Whatever that is.
Alright already. WHAT is the recipe? By now viewers are hoping their baking soda and cherry Jell-O haven’t expired and wondering where a person buys berberine.
After at least 20 minutes of blabbing about “the recipe,” it is revealed that there is no way those of us who aren’t scientists or doctors could possibly mix up the recipe and get these unbelievable results. Unbelievable being the key word.
You have to buy the pills, or the liquid, or whatever form they’ve put their particular magic potion in so the exact portions are correct. Some even say they will personalize the product for your age and the amount of weight you want to lose.
I became sort of fascinated with these videos and started asking lots of women (there were no men on the videos I watched) to see if they had tried any of the products or knew anyone who had. I found one. She spent around $100 on pills and didn’t lose a single pound.
If you or anyone you know has ordered one of these products and actually lost weight, please let me know. At this point I would have to see it to believe it.
Reach Bonnie Bing at bingbylines@gmail.com
